Do You Love Yourself?

Do you love yourself? I feel like most people respond to this question by saying “of course I love myself”. But have you really ever taken time and thought about it. I have personally taken some time and thought this question through. I dissected what love means to me and how I love others and how I want to be loved.  It’s something that I never really gave much thought to. I always just thought that it was a given that everyone loves themselves. I was definitely wrong about that. I thought of how I want my loved ones to be treated. I also thought of the things I find unacceptable for the ones I love. Then I reflected and noticed that all these ways I love and how I want my loved ones to be treated is not how I love and let myself be treated. This was my biggest breakthrough. If I really love me, then why do I eat crappy food but feed my children only healthy foods?, why do I tell my children they are perfect just the way they are and then criticize how I look in the mirror?. Don’t I love me as much as I love them?

I spoke to some of my friends and family about this question and I found that I was not the only one with the same issue.

I feel that the lack of self-love is a big problem that a lot of people suffer from. This is the root of other issues such as self-esteem issues, finance issues, success issues, etc. I think that any problem you are dealing with can be rooted back to love.

“Love is something we can choose, the same way we choose anger, or hate, or sadness. We can choose to forgive someone who has hurt us and begin to finally heal. We can choose to be grateful for what we have. We can choose love. It’s always a choice within us.” – Louise Hay

Do you know the saying “treat others how you would like to be treated”? Wel, I think you should start treating yourself, the way you want to be treated. If you want to be loved, first love yourself, if you want to be respected, respect yourself. It seems like an easy enough thing to do but it is something you have to actively work at. You have to constantly and actively love yourself and tell yourself that. Literally look in a mirror and say out loud “I LOVE YOU” and mean it. Recite this to yourself, make it a mantra, and meditate on it.

I want to share with you some thoughts and tips that I think will help you love yourself a little bit more and get closer to being the best version of you.

  • Be your own best friend
  • Love your body and be conscious of what you ingest. If you love yourself and your body, why would you feed it crap?
  • Shower yourself with love (Positive affirmations!!)
  • Don’t be judgmental of yourself (your only human, you make mistakes)
  • Look in the mirror every day and say “I LOVE YOU” and mean it
  • Embrace your imperfections
  • Celebrate your accomplishments and all your little achievements just like you would for your loved ones
  • Put yourself first
  • Respect yourself or no one will
  • Don’t take any crap from anyone
  • Treat yourself like you treat the people you love
  • Be patient with yourself
  • Focus on the positive things in your life

 

If you want to dig a little deeper into this subject of self-love, I would like to recommend a great person and author (Louise Hay). I have read one of her books “You can heal your life” and it really opened my mind to a lot of different things. Things that I have never really thought of but that resonated with me. I really believe this book is for everyone and it really makes you think. I personally love books that open your mind to new ideas and new ways of thinking. Sometimes it takes someone else’s perspective for you to see things in your own life that you did not before. This book definitely did that for me and maybe it will for you as well. I will put a link to this book at the bottom of this post for you to check out.

 

#Tips for Success

Hey guys so at the beginning of this year it was pretty rough for me. I hate to say it but I was in a bit of a rut that seemed at the time to be never-ending. I didn’t know at the time how I was going to get out of it and thought for sure I was going to stay right where I was in life. Normally I am never one to dwell on my feelings for a long time. Usually, I will bounce back from whatever is happening right away. This time it was different. It was just one hit after another in my life and I was just feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes life can get hard and make you feel like things will never turn around. Well that’s where I was but life definitely turned around for me. I want to share with you some tips and how I turned my life around and hopefully, if you are in a bad place in life or just in need of a change, you can use these tips to turn your life around too.

  1. Stop the pity party– I was guilty of this for a long time and I think it is the major reason why it took me so long to get out of my rut. It doesn’t matter if you’re complaining to others or just to yourself. You need to stop. You may think if you are just thinking these bad things to yourself that you aren’t throwing a pity party but YOU ARE, it’s just a party of one. If you constantly think or say out loud these phrases you need to quit it, “why me?”, “My life sucks”, “Nothing good ever happens to me”, “I never win at anything”. By just having these negative thoughts you are just making your self-fulfilling prophecy come true. Instead of thinking negative thoughts turn those thoughts into positive ones. You will be surprised how just a thought can turn things around. I will admit it is very hard to think positive when nothing seems to be going right. You just need to stop those bad thoughts in their tracks and just say to yourself, “Good things will happen for me”, “I am successful”, “I am beautiful”, and “I am worthy”. Positive affirmations are so important, if you think it, it will be.

 

  1. Set Goals– Ok, so now that you have turned your negative thoughts into positive ones, what’s next? You need to think of what you want to accomplish and how you will accomplish it. Write down your goals. If it is down on paper, it makes the thought more realistic and concrete. I think it is best to make both long-term goals and then some short-term goals. If that seems too daunting to start you can make daily, weekly or even monthly goals. Make sure that your goals are doable in the time frame you choose, you don’t want to set yourself up for failure. Be realistic! Don’t just make a random goal and not give yourself a time frame because then that is just a wish not a goal.

 

  1. Execute– Great, so now you have your daily positive affirmations going and you have written out your goals, now it’s time to execute them. Put those goals into action. Remember to take baby steps, there is no need to rush. One thing that used to slow me down in the past was not having instant satisfaction. So on that note add this to your daily affirmations, “Nothing great ever comes easy or overnight”. This is the truth, prepare yourself for a long haul. Take pride in small wins. There is no such thing as overnight success. You have to work hard and be persistent at whatever you do and no matter what happens don’t give up.

 

I hope that these tips will help you in your journey to a successful year and a successful life. I know sometimes life will knock you down and it seems impossible to get yourself up but know that it’s not impossible. Know that you are the only one that can turn things around. You have all the tools you just need to put them to work.

 

“Desire is the key to motivation, but it’s determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal – a commitment to excellence – that will enable you to attain the success you seek.” –Mario Andretti

 

 

#BachelorNation

This season of The Bachelor was my first time ever watching the series (I know I’m late, lol). My sister made me watch one night and I was hooked after one episode. My sister is a super fan of the show and its spin-offs (The Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise). Did you know that the fans of this show call themselves “Bachelor Nation”, hence the name of this postJ. I couldn’t believe the following that show has. I mean, I’ve known about the show for years obviously (I don’t live under a rock) but I just have never really been interested in watching. Well that all changed this year.

Just to give you guys a little background on the show, here are some Bachelor Facts:

  • Show first aired on March 25, 2002 (I was 14 yrs. old!!!)
  • The show has run for 20 seasons
  • There has been a total of 12 proposals resulting from the show

*Most recent- Ben Higgins and Lauren Bushnell *

So now that you guys know all about The Bachelor, here are my thoughts overall. I think what captivates people with this show is that it is all about finding love. That is something that every human wants and hopes to find.  I know this is just a reality show and most so called reality shows are sometimes fake and scripted, but this show is really well produced. Also, the intensity in which the show plays out is just addicting. The women that are chosen to be contestants are such characters. They are so interesting to watch and sometimes so crazy, you can’t help but tune in to see their antics. I commend the casting crew. They do a good job.  You just never know what is going to happen. That is what had me tuning in every Monday night, the suspense. I needed to know who was going to get a rose and more importantly who WASN’T.

The season was definitely a roller coaster but a really entertaining one. My favorite girl to watch, well until she was sent home was Olivia. She was the “crazy” one. Watching Olivia speak was just insane, you just couldn’t believe the things that would come out of her mouth. She was beyond delusional but like I said before, very entertaining. Throughout the show there were many girls that were fun to watch. Every episode there was new drama. As the season boiled down to the end, I really got attached to JoJo. She was one of the final two in the show. I was so devastated when the finale aired this Monday night and Ben (The Bachelor) didn’t choose to propose to JoJo but instead chose Lauren L .

Even though I was so sad for JoJo, I know she will be fine. Actually more than fine, she is going to be the next Bachelorette. I will definitely be tuning in to watch her journey to find love.

 

#School-Aged Tantrums?

So did you think that only toddlers and infants throw tantrums? Well you would be wrong. I have been dealing with my sons anger tantrums for quite a while now and I think I have got a handle on them now. But don’t get me wrong, I have really struggled and at times felt like such a failure as a mother because of it.

Just to give you a few examples of the behavior that I was dealing with here is a little list:

  • Stomping
  • Slamming doors
  • Throwing belongings
  • Screaming/Crying

So I would like to share some tips for you mother’s that might be dealing with a similar situation with your child :

  1. Be Calm– I don’t know about you but I have a short temper and I struggle with my patience. I really needed to work on my approach when dealing with my sons tantrums. Do NOT scream, it will only lead to more screaming. Remember children learn behavior from US. Speak to your child in a calm relaxed voice. They will follow your example.
  2. Go to their level– Towering over your child and demanding them to act a certain way is just going to fuel their fire. Imagine a person bigger and stronger than you towering over you and yelling? Not very fun. Take a knee and look them in the eye, get on their level.
  3. Ask questions– They are not acting out for no reason. The reason might not seem important to you but it is or was important to your child. They wouldn’t act like the way that they are for no reason. Even though you might think that is the case. Ask your child what upset them and why? Ask them if they think their actions were good or bad?  (You will be surprised at the responses)
  4. Compromise– After you have gotten to the bottom of the situation, come up with a solution Together. Talk it out. DON’T yell it out!

This method of diffusing tantrums has really worked for me and my children ( I have 2 boys ). My son now has tantrums significantly less but when they do happen, we handle them right away. And in a calm way not a screaming match.

I hope this helps any moms that might have run out of strategies or just want a new approach to dealing with tantrums.

#Parkinson’s Disease

Parkinson's

So today I want to share with you a serious topic that is very personal to me. Parkinson’s Disease (PD) has affected me and my family for a long time now. My father was diagnosed about 12 years ago with this disease. He was only 40 years old at the time. Everyone is always surprised at the age that he was diagnosed.

For a long time my father would down play his diagnosis and make me feel as though he could be cured eventually. But that is definitely not the case, if you did not already know, there is no cure for this horrible chronic disease. I was only a teenager when my father was diagnosed so I believed anything he told me. I had always been a daddy’s girl. Also my father didn’t have the “traditional” symptoms of PD. I thought that all persons effected by PD had tremors. My father did not and still doesn’t. So I never really looked into the disease or asked about what his doctor’s were telling him. He would go to his appointments, get his medications and then just tell me whatever he wanted me to know.

I truly regret not asking more questions and getting more involved with my fathers health early on. But now that I am informed and have gone to doctors visits with him and now I feel a lot better being in the loop.  My advice to anyone that has a parent or relative that is living with PD is, Get INVOLVED. They need an advocate. They need to be kept positive that there will be a cure.

What I feel people don’t know is that Parkinson’s looks different for everyone. Not everyone that has this disease is like Michael J. Fox or Mohammed Ali. My father actually doesn’t have any tremors. So if you saw him you wouldn’t know what he has. But my father is a strong man and a very strong Christian. I know that this disease will not overcome him, he will overcome this disease. This disease does NOT define him.

What is Parkinson’s Disease?

-PD is a progressive and chronic movement disorder.

** Nearly 1 million people in the US are living with PD. Estimated 10 million worldwide.

What causes Parkinson’s?

-The cause is still unknown.

To find more information about Parkinson’s Disease and how you can get involved on helping to find a cure, you can visit these websites:

  1. www.pdf.org – this site has great resources for those affected by PD, has helped me so much.
  2. www.parkinson.org
  3. www.apdaparkinson.org
  4. www.michaeljfox.org
  5. www.unitywalk.org – I am personally apart of this charity. ‘Team Hernandez’ is the name of my team if you would like to join us in this walk for Parkinson’s awareness. Below I have attached a link where you can donate.

#NursingSchoolJourney

I started my journey to nursing school when I was 21 years old. I had just had my second child and I knew I needed to continue my education. Not only for myself but to give my children a good life and be a good example to them.

At the time I started college I was living in South Carolina (I was born and raised in New York). I decided to move there because living in New York at the time was too expensive for me and I wanted to live comfortably. Thanks to my amazing mother that helped me with the move, I was ready to start school. I decided to attend a local technical college. It was the least expensive choice and they had a good track record.

Before I even started my first class I researched every class I needed to take and planned out  my whole college career. I knew what type of nurse I wanted to be and everything I needed to do to get there. But as we all know too well , “while we make plans, God laughs”. My very thought out plan did not go as planned.

When I started school I needed to take a lot of pre-requisites and that was totally OK with me. Unfortunately I am not a gifted mathematician, so I had to take some extra math classes. My goal was to take all the pre-req courses I needed to complete my BSN at a university. The competition to get into the nursing programs in all the colleges that were near me were SUPER competitive. Everyone had a 4.0 and a degree already (talk about pressure). That was not me unfortunately, I was a stay at home mom with a new born and a toddler. Getting time to study was hard for me but some how I passed all of my classes. I was in the middle of the semester of my second year of pre reqs and bomb went off in my life. I had to leave school and move back home to NYC.

I was so disappointed that my life plan was just shredded to pieces but I needed to keep it together for my boys. At this point in my life, I had to put my school dreams aside for a little while so that I could provide for my family. I had planned to get into a school in New York as soon as I arrived but again “We plan and God laughs”. That didn’t happen. My short break from school turned into three years away from school.

The reason why it took me so long to get back to school was that I just got comfortable making money. But after so long doing something that I didn’t love, it really started taking a toll on me. So after so long of not being in a classroom, I registered for classes at a community college near me. I transferred some of my credits  but only a few transferred to my new school. This was very upsetting to say the least but I just needed to keep moving towards my goal.

After two semesters in school in New York I was accepted into the LPN program. I was ECSTATIC when I got the news of my acceptance. What I have worked on for so long was finally coming into action. The semester was very grueling. So much to learn in such little time. I worked my butt off and I even left my job to focus on studying. I really was giving this nursing program my ALL.

clinicals
clinicals

Then life threw another curve ball at me. I got severely sick in the second month of school. I was in the emergency room twice and then admitted for 3 days. The worst part of it was that the doctors could not figure out what was wrong with me! On top of not knowing what was wrong with me, I needed to be on my ‘A” game at school and I felt like I was dying. I still made it to class to take exams so that I wouldn’t receive a 0 for not taking the exams. I got the class notes from my amazing classmates that stood by me while my health was failing me. Finally I started to feel better and I was back at it, giving my nursing program all I had.

After all that hard work and after studying every spare minute I had, I didn’t make it to the second semester of my program. I was devastated to say the least. I did make the score I needed in one of the classes. The way the program works is if you receive less then a C+ in any class you fail out of the whole program (HARSH).

I am sharing my story to let you all know that no matter what life throws at you, you just need to keep moving forward. No matter what happens to me and how ever many curve balls life wants to throw at me, I will keep moving towards my goals. So I am going to start a new program this Fall 2016. I will not give up!

#FUTURENURSE #NURSINGSCHOOLJOURNEY